It’s 9:24 am, August 20th. Last Friday, I was a guest on a Tyra Banks Show in New York being
taped for a September date. I was brought on to share some tips on how to spot fake jewelry.
Prior to the show I decked out three ladies with real bling, fake bling,and mystery bling.To learn the
secret of the mystery bling, you will have to watch the show when it airs in September
(I’ve been sworn to secrecy). I also draped Tyra with over 10 million dollars of ice! During our segment
the audience was asked to determine the fake from the real. They also had to choose between a 30ct
and a 10ct rock on stage. One was worth millions;one was worth only a couple hundred dollars.
After the voting, I unveiled who was wearing the real deal. Then I provided a few pointers on spotting
the imposters. By the way, Tyra is even more beautiful in person. But, beyond her beauty,
it was obvious as I saw her work with her fantastic staff and the audience that she is 100% genuine.
What you see is what you get. No faÃ§ade, no pretext. Then it hit me, the fakes we most need to worry
about aren’t the fake hand bags, jewelry, or designer knock offs. The fakes we need to know how to spot
are fake people! People my dad likes to call ‘disingenuous’. The liars, con artists, and cheats are the
ones we must know how to spot. After the taping of the show, when I got to La Guardia airport in
New York and was pummeled with one delay after another for eight hours (I’m not
complaining Continental Airlines; I do appreciate you getting me home even if it was 4:30 in the morning,
I had plenty of time to people watch and think about all the phonies I’ve encountered in my life.
I characterized my three ring circus of clowns into four categories: ‘insisters,’ ‘doubters’, ‘perpetrators’
and ‘down to earthers.’
I’m sure everyone has someone in their life who thinks they are never wrong about anything.
I like to call these people ‘The Insisters’. If you are in the middle of a conversation and you utter
the smallest detail that they think they can correct, they’ll stop you in mid-sentence and point
out that, in fact, the weather prediction for today is partly cloudy with a 20% chance of afternoon showers,
not scattered clouds with a 15% chance of a sprinkle! It doesn’t matter what you are talking about;
they are right and you are wrong! The reason these people are the first group
of fakes that I wanted to talk about is because these ‘know it alls’ are everywhere!
Seriously, if these folks are such geniuses, why are they wasting time talking to us?
What I think you’ll find about these ‘Insisters’ (even the ones with all the letters behind their names)
is a deep down insecurity of who they are. People who have to keep telling me how smart they are,
what a good Christian they are, usually are people with deep reservations about their own identities.
How do you spot an ‘Insister’? Their words speak louder than their actions.
Their litany of facts is not backed up with accomplishments that benefit anyone else but themselves.
If someone tries to steal your thunder, kick them out of your life.
‘Doubters’ are an identity crisis waiting to happen. They have fake lives because they take no chances.
They doubt themselves, you and everything else that comes their way. ‘Doubters’
complain about anything and everything. They have an excuse for everything.
‘Doubters’ aren’t at the helm of their own lives and allow the winds of change to guide them.
‘Doubters’ will leech the life out of you, if you let them, by getting caught up in their drama.
They are always pitching some sob story to get you to feel sorry for them. They should probably be
called emotional vampires because of their ability to harvest your energy! These fake people need to be
avoided at all cost! They are easy to spot because their favorite opening lines are, ‘Did I tell you the
horrible thing that happened to me today?’and ‘Life’s not fair!’
Do you want to see more ‘perpetrators’ per square inch? Go to Rodeo Drive in Hollywood. ‘Perpetrators’
buy cars they can’t afford, live in houses that take up city blocks and wear
clothes, watches, and jewelry to tell the world how special they are. Now, I will confess, there have been
times in my life that I spent too much time trying to impress people I didn’t know and be something
I wasn’t. It’s an easy trap to fall into. Your neighbor, the Jones’, is showing off their new ride with spinners
and suddenly you allow someone to let you feel less than who you are.
So what do you do? You show them by maxing out your credit cards, getting heavily in debt,
to be something you aren’t. Which, at least for the present time, isn’t wealthy. Want to know an
interesting fact? The people who flaunt their wealth are some of the poorest people on the planet! The guy
still driving the Oldsmobile next door is the millionaire. The saying may go,
‘If you got it, flaunt it.’ But more and more people are flaunting what they don’t own. If material
possessions are the keys you use to get into your kingdom, don’t be surprised when you wake up one
day in the zoo!
Quick story: A wise man was once walking on a dirt road when a stranger approached him and
started mocking him for his simple clothing and bare feet. ‘Hey old man, look
at you, you are nothing! You don’t even have any money for sandals
for your feet! What are you, a bum?’ The wise man responded
‘If I reach into my pockets and place all my worldly possessions
at your feet and you refuse to accept them, who do they belong to?’
The stranger said, ‘Well, they still belong to you.’
The wise man replied, ‘Then, I do not accept the things you have said to me.
So I guess they still belong to you.’
The Down to Earthers:
‘Down to earth’ people don’t find their self-worth in the things people say about them or in the
possessions that they own. They find who they are the hard way-by looking at
themselves in the mirror each day and asking one simple question,
‘Is this who I am?’ How do you spot a fake? Start by looking in the mirror.
If you like what you see, surround yourself with the same.
If you do that, you won’t have to worry about fakes.