Vol 4.3 "True Friends" March 8, 2005

It’s 9:30 AM, March 8th, 2005. This weekend, my wife shared with me an e-mail
a friend sent her. After I read it I knew I had to share it with everyone.
The author is anonymous.

I am sick and tired of all those sissy “friendship” poems that always sound so
goodie goodie, but never actually come close to reality! Well, here is a
series of promises that really speaks to what I think true friendship is all

True Friends

1. When you are sad – I will help get you
drunk and plot revenge against the
sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue – I will try to
dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile – I will know you
finally got laid.

4. When you are scared – I will rag on
you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried – I will tell you
horrible stories about how much worse it
could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused – I will use
little words.

7. When you are sick – Stay the hell away
from me until you are well again. I
don’t want whatever you have.

8. When you fall – I will point and laugh at
your clumsy ass.

This is my oath; I pledge it till the end. Why, you may ask–because you are
my friend.

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can
only think of two and one of them isn’t speaking to you right now anyway.

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you
move the body. Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel.

Talk to you next time,


The founder and president of Diamond Cutters International, is one of the worlds top diamond experts, as well as a three-time Guinness Book record holder in jewelry design.
Fred The Diamond Guy
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