My girlfriend and I…soon to be fiance:) have been together for 3 years at the end of June. I don’t know how involved you get with the sex aspect, but here I go. We have a pretty good sex life, but I get the feeling that I get enough attention. It seems to always end up with me pleasing her by touching then we make love, missonary. That’s it. I don’t get touched, she won’t let me do anything else to her other than touch her. I’m not looking for anything kinky or crazy just more attention and some change in the style. I think the problem is is that I’m fairly easily aroused, like most men, and she figures I’m excited and I don’t need any attention. I guess my question is how can I change this monotony and be sensitive about the situation if I end up bringing it up to her as she is very insecure? Thank you.


Hi Unsatisfied,

Unfortunately women have been made to feel guilty about their sexuality. Here’s where you can help. Talk to her openly and honestly about your feelings. Tell her that you need to be touched and how. Then set up a romantic evening with some wine and the two of you experiment. Gently show each other what you like and ask her what she likes. Make her feel comfortable. Know that it will take more than once. Plan these evenings often and you will be amazed how pleasurable your sex life will become.

P.S. Thank you for being the type of person that is considerate enough to share wanting to be more intimate.