What does a diamond’s shape tell about the wearer?
A palm reader supposedly can tell you your future and a numerologist says they can do the same thing by adding and subtracting the numbers of the day, month and year you were born. An astrologer goes so far as to say they can tell you who you are, where your future lies and what you’re going to have for lunch by what moon phase was in what orbit when you were born!
According to all these mystics, who we are and why we do what we do is all predetermined by fate. All we have to do is know how to read the signs to tell us what path our lives will follow and what our final destination will be.
“Yeah, right!” you’re probably saying, “I am the captain of my own ship and the creator of my own destiny.” Well maybe so, but how can you explain every time you check your daily astrology guide they seem to be pretty accurate? Lucky guess? Maybe. So vague it could apply to anyone? Maybe. Or maybe it’s just as simple as thought creates reality. If you are told something and you believe it, I guess it doesn’t make a difference whether it’s true or not. If it’s true for you, even if it’s just a perception, it’s your reality, your truth.
Now, probably at this point you’re thinking, if you’re still reading… What the heck does this conversation have to do with diamonds and for that matter what does it have to do with a title “Getting into Shape?” which I know you have figured out, doesn’t mean doing twenty push-ups or jumping jacks. What we are delving into here is why women get into or choose one shape diamond over another. That’s what I’m getting to. Believe it or not, what shape a woman chooses for an engagement ring tells a lot about the woman doing the wearing.
After almost two decades of watching women choose different shapes and sizes I found that certain personality types tend to gravitate towards one particular shape or another. I’ve also found that certain shapes tend to have a higher divorce rate than other shapes! Oh, I’ve got your interest now have I? Yes, I’ve actually been able to graph which shapes tend to have the highest divorce rates, which ones result in the best marriages and which ones are more likely to fool around!
Am I crazy? Probably. Sane is just plain boring. But if you’re interested in one guy’s observations, here it goes. Astrologers, numerologists, palm readers, and tarot card readers step aside. (Drum roll please) I’d like to introduce for the audience’s enjoyment the wonderful world of Dia-shape-ology!
Disclaimer: The following is just a test, in case of a real emergency you will be instructed where to go and what to do, this is only a test.
Fill out the following questionnaire and answer honestly to determine what your diamond says about you.
Question #1: Do you have a diamond? (Circle One)
Yes No (If no please stop taking this test.)
Question #2: What shape diamond do you have?
Question #3: What size diamond do you have? (Circle One)
B. Nice Size
C. A Boulder
D. I can’t lift my hand from the weight.
Question #4: How long have you had your diamond? (Circle One)
A. Less than 2 years
B. 2-5 years
C. 5-7 years
D. I can’t remember it’s been so long.
Question #5: Are you still with the person who gave you the diamond? (Circle One)
Yes No (If you bought it yourself, the answer will always be yes.)
Question #6: How often do you clean your diamond? (Circle One)
A. Once a day
B. Once a week
C. When it gets dirty
D. I’m supposed to clean my diamond?
Question #7: Pick the statement that best describes your relationship with your diamond. (Circle One)
A. I will keep my diamond till the day I die, we are inseparable.
B. I will keep my diamond till the day I die unless
something better comes along.
Check the following answer guide to see how you’ve done and determine what your diamond means to you and what it says to the world about the person you are.
P.S. If you liked this piece, I receive my fan mail at email@example.com
and if you didn’t, I was kidnapped two weeks ago and forced to write this against my will.
Question #1: Obviously for the purpose of this exercise having a diamond is a prerequisite. Not to say that if you are not the owner of a diamond you are any less loved and appreciated. It just seems that way.
Question #2: Here’s the meat and potatoes; the meaning of the top shapes:
Round – Congratulations! Round is the most popular, faithful, traditional and religious. Most round wearers chose a round for its clean lines and symmetry. The idea that a circle has no beginning and no end adds to the romance of a round. Round wearers tend to be old fashioned, honest with values and beliefs they would fight for. The only down side to some that choose a round is their lack of spontaneity and leadership abilities. Round wearers tend to be more team players than team leaders. If a round wearer is married, her main goal in keeping a long loving relationship is to not be afraid of change.
Oval – Look, you would have gotten a round if everyone in your family including your aunt Gertrude didn’t have one. You have all the same values of a round but there is something inside you that cries out to be different and not go with the crowd. Oval wearers make great wives! On one side they are predictable, stable and dependable but every now and then they have a wild hair and let loose! If not the poor brilliancy of an oval I believe a lot more women would be in this camp.
Pear – Where round wearers tend to go with the crowd pear wearers want to create the crowd. Pear wearers pure and simple want to be different. If better comes along with the package so be it. Pear wearers tend to be more demanding and higher maintenance. Everything has to be just right or don’t do it at all is their battle call. Pear wearers are the third most likely to get a divorce. (Top two coming up.) Due to, in many cases forgetting that happiness isn’t always asking “What’s in it for me?” The happily married pear wearer never forgets that there is no I in TEAM and applies the same standards of excellence to herself as to her partner.
Emerald Cut – Here’s a tough nut to crack. Emerald Cut wearers are old fashioned like round wearers but being in the crowd, following the crowd is not the drum beat that they follow. In fact, the interesting thing about Emerald Cut wearers is their lack of rationale to do anything to impress others. Not that other people’s opinions don’t count, it’s just that they don’t see themselves through the eyes of others. Emerald Cut wearers are leaders. They are attracted to an Emerald Cut for its quiet elegance, its regal temperament and bold strokes. The Emerald Cut wearer doesn’t need pop to sell her diamond, that’s what she is there for.
Princess & Radiants – Princess and Radiant wearers are electric. They are fun, exciting, cutting edge and not afraid to take chances. They live life to the fullest. Since Princess and Radiant are the most sparkly shapes, wearers of these rocks don’t mind bringing attention to themselves. They love the spotlight. Whitney Houston for example is a proud wearer of a radiant. The only time Princess and Radiant wearers split up with their mates are if the guy can’t keep up.
Heart Shape – The heart shape A.K.A. “Black Widow” and “Three Strikes”, holds the title of the least sparkly, second highest divorce rate and the most cheated upon diamond in the group. Hence the alias “Three Strikes”. A lot of analysis has gone into why this diamond and its wearer have so much trouble, but I think it can best be explained on what type of woman and couple gravitate towards the heart; pure romantics. And when I say pure romantics, I’m not just saying soulmates, I’m talking maple syrup, knight in shining armor, Romeo and Juliet kind of romantic. Heart shape people tend to live in fantasyland. Their motto is love conquers all, love has no restrictions, love has no boundaries. Then they get married and quickly find out that even though love in its own little world is perfect, life isn’t. Life isn’t fair or just or even handed. Life equals change. The heart shape wearer tends to have a problem with this. If love is perfect, no need for change and certainly no need for reality. So when they come to the conclusion that their mate isn’t perfect (he never was, nobody is) and discover pure love doesn’t seem to pay the bills, they flee; into the arms of another, into another job, into another life constantly searching for the equation of pure love equals perfect life, which doesn’t exist.
Marquise – The Marquise for all its grandeur and magnificence (one of the largest looking shapes) is the crown jewel for divorce. Even more so than the heart. Heck, at least the heart had good intentions. Marquise wearers tend to be very concerned with first impressions, second impressions, all impressions. They are very goal oriented and certainly believe size matters. Marquise wearers believe in division and better than. There is the wrong side of the tracks and it’s never the side they are on. A lot of socialites and wanna-be socialites choose Marquise because they look bigger than they really are when cut right. And that’s where the problem is. Marquise wearers, not all, but quite a few spend the better part of their lives trying to be something or someone they are not. Success never lies in not being and loving who you are. For a Marquise wearer to survive she must realize that regardless of how nice a package is, it always fades away; Inner beauty doesn’t.
Question #3: What actual carat size you have is irrelevant to how you perceive it. To some people the one carat diamond they have is puny. For others, it’s the rock of Gibraltar. But that’s the key here, not what you have but how you perceive it. Is the glass half full or half empty? It appears that the happiest marriages tend to be those in which the engagement diamond is viewed as magnificent and substantial. The minute a woman finds fault in the rock or lack of it, it’s not long before she finds fault in the giver. Want to appreciate your diamond? Just think of the one out of three women who got married and didn’t get one.
Question #4: If you had to write a list of all the things you want, how long a list would it be? Long? Short? How about a list of all the things you need? Long? Short? The three steps for creation are thought, word, and action. To get anything done you have to think it, verbalize it, then take action. When you announce to the world there are things you need and want or expect you cannot be whole till you get them. And if your brain perceives that it is without or not whole it won’t be happy. The key to any long term happiness is not getting everything you want, but wanting everything you have. The longer you’ve had your diamond and the longer you appreciate it, the better your life and marriage will be. The diamond is a symbol of where you were and where you are going. To always embrace your past as you do your present will empower you to learn from your experiences and not repeat those events that no longer define who you are today.
Question #5: Well, I think this one is pretty self-explanatory. If the diamond is a symbol of two that have joined to become one and one of you is not on the scene any more, chances are your rock means very little to you today.
Question #6: To have and to hold doesn’t necessarily equate with to love and to cherish. I’ve lined up a hundred couples and asked them the condition of their marriage and relationship and I found a direct correlation between clean rings and great marriages and filthy rings and relationships that no longer connected or were drifting apart. Just a coincidence? Could be. Or maybe it’s that any good marriage takes work, care and effort. Marriage isn’t easy. When a problem arises, a lot of people just let it go, thinking it will fix itself. It won’t. A clean ring will always get dirty unless you don’t allow it. A good marriage will do the same unless you work at it and keep the dust off.
Question #7: Fifty-four percent of women who receive an engagement ring say they would never get rid of their original engagement ring. They would keep it till they die. Forty-six percent however, say that even though they have fond memories of their original engagement ring, they wouldn’t keep the first car they ever had or first home they ever had! If better comes along they will snatch it! That being said, here’s how the divorce bug attacks each group. Seventy-five percent in group one “The I’ll keep it forever” folks tend to stay married while eighty percent in group two are splitsville.
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