I don’t even really know where to start. I’ve never been one to ask for anything, for fear of seeming selfish, but as I sit here and share my story, I hope that my words may perhaps justify my wish.
My name is Molly, and I am 21 years old. I have been married for almost a year and a half now, and together, my husband and I have a beautiful daughter. My husband and I had dated briefly during our high school years, right after he was forced to move across the country from California to Ohio. I know that it seems silly, but even back then, we knew that something was “right” between us. Unfortunately, his step-sister at the time held some grudge against me, whether it be jealousy or just pure hatred, through no fault of my own. She deemed it necessary to seperate us, and would call to harass me and told my husband that unless he broke up with me, she would attack me one day with her friends. To protect me, he called me up to break it off. We never spoke again for 5 years. I had never known what all she had told him, I only knew that it was obvious she didn’t want me around. I was deeply hurt by the situation, as I could never figure out what I had done wrong to make him want to leave me.
My self esteem, which had never been very high before I met him, sank to a new low that same December and I tumbled into depression where I was so desperate to get people to like me. So desperate was I, in fact, that I grasped on to the next guy who even showed any interest in me. Never did I think what I could be getting myself into. This new boy started out acting all nice, and then came the name calling and eventually the physical abuse followed. I suffered for 3 years, not wanting to realize that I did not deserve to hurt. During that time, I had started college to become a pharmacist, but I was not able to escape to another state because I was warned of the consequences (read:bruises) I might encounter if I were even to attempt that.
My sophomore year, I got a chance to stay by myself for one evening, so I decided to go out to a local fast food restuarant to study and have a milkshake. Never could I have imagined what that night would bring. I was sitting chatting with one of my friends who was on lunch break from that restaurant, and up walked a guy he knew who wanted to chat with him. I took one look at the guy and I said “Is your name Spencer?” he replied “Is your name Molly?” It was the same boy I had dated years before in high school! We talked for hours that night, realizing that we both had never left the city, and had probably just barely missed running into each other on numerous occasions. Somehow, seeing him again, I got this feeling of safety finally, as if he were a lifeline there waiting for me.
Over the next weeks, Spencer gave me the courage to break all ties with my abusive ex-boyfriend. My ex continued to harass us, making threats, coming through on them once, but Spencer then promised me that I would never have to worry about my ex again, and that he would protect me.
We were engaged that July. I was trying to make ends meet for college, and he had no job at the time, so there was no ring involved, but his word meant more than any ring could to me. I became pregnant two months later, and our world was turned completely upside-down. I tried to stay in college as long as I could, but I finally had to set my education on the back burner because I knew that my changing body could no longer withstand the requirements of the clinical rotations with my pharmacy program.
Out of college, I could no longer work at my Federal Work Study job at the university and Spencer had to take up the slack, as I simply did not have the energy to take on another job. He took the first job that he could find, working at a discount store. The pay was low, and he often skipped meals so that I could have food to eat to support the baby. I had tried to apply for food stamps, but in a cruel twist of fate, I was not eligible because I was not married and still under age 24. He was so good to me and worked every chance that he could get, just so that we could halfway get by. We were married in a very small ceremony on Leap Year 2000, paid for mostly by his mother, a cancer survivor, who had flown out from California to be there for us.
We bought my wedding band ourselves, and Spencer chose to wear an extra one that my parents had by chance. With the money that Spencer saved from not buying a band for himself, he suprised me with a small engagement ring he had purchased in an antique shop. I’m not even sure if the stone could have a carat weight tagged to it, but it sure made me feel like a princess to have it placed upon my finger.
Spencer had to go back to work the next day after we were married, so at least we didn’t have to explain to people that we couldn’t afford a honeymoon, we only had to say that Spencer couldn’t get any time off from work. Our daughter was born in May 2000, and once again Spencer couldn’t get any time off from work. We could only afford for him to skip one day, and so Spencer had to leave his newborn daughter and I at the hospital so that he could earn a few dollars to support us.
In July of that same year, Spencer got hired in at a good factory job in the area, and although he has at least an hour drive up the interstate to work each day and an hour back, he still continues to work 3rd shift at the factory so that he can earn a little extra money by way of his shift premium. We’ve scrimped and saved enough for a downpayment, and I’m proud to say that Spencer bought us a very modest apartment that we actually own.
But on to the reason for me wanting to Adopt A Diamondâ„¢ into our family–Spencer has worked so very hard to get us the basic necessities in life. He is such a good man and a wonderful father. The only thing is that I can see the hurt in his eyes at times. We’ll be walking the baby in the mall on a rainy Saturday afternoon and walk past the jewelry stores. I can see him looking in the windows, and I know what’s on his mind. He’s always told me that he would get me a nice ring someday, but I honestly can’t see that as feasible, living with our means. You see, he not only has to work for the mortgage and the utilities and food and clothing, but he also has to work for the repayment of my college loans.
I know in my heart that he only wants to get me a nicer ring to show to me how much me loves me, but I honestly don’t believe that I deserve such an act of selflessness on my behalf. The way I see it, an adopted ring would not only be an outward example of what all Spencer has done for me, but it would also be a way for us to save money to get him something for himself that he truly deserves.
Thank you for your time,
Molly C. Lorge, Lima, OH