Hello, I have been dating a girl for 3 yrs and she is trying to adopt a 5yo girl. We currently have demanding jobs and live in seperate towns 120 mi away. She has been pushing me from day one to get married. I told her that I wasn’t ready and she still pushes. I have no more interaction with friends or family other than dropping off my dog bc I have to run over to her house immediately or she will get mad. She constantly makes me feel guilty for spending money (100 or less) on things to repair my house and says that that money should go to her ring fund. I have offered her to move in and she said no bc she wants a ring first and I understand. Well now everytime her friends get engaged or she sees it on tv, she cries all day. I told her that she will get a ring when I can afford one…so she gave me 3000 dollars. I feel like I have been stripped clean of all my pride, manhood and my own being. I feel as though I am only there to show off, be a mate and pay the bills. What am I doing wrong? I drive back and forth 2-4x a month 300 miles total and she may do it once every other month. I feel like she is making me do everything and she can just bark orders are me like i am a lil bitch. please help . Thank you!!!



Hi Jeff,

Let me start with this. If you aren’t ready to be married to her after 3 years, she’s not the one. Don’t keep stringing her along. You know in your heart that this is right, and it’s not. A mate should help you acheive in being a better person. You shouldn’t feel less. Pushing for marriage at day one is ridiculous. After 3 years if it was supposed to be, it would. Marriage never makes a situation better. People generally tend to be on their best behaviour before marriage. Many let it all hang out after. Let her go so she can find the right person for her and so you can find the right person for you.